20071107: WTFUCLA Edition

Dennis Franchione, Texas A&M: All the smoke in Texas Station points to a new sheriff coming town. If you read between the lines of the smoke signals it says Tommy Tuberville has saddled up and started heading west. Franchione’s cupcake inspired success from 2006 just wasn’t enough to please the people paying the bills.

Bill Callahan, Nebraska: 76, nuff said.  The only question is who will Tom Osbourne hire. After firing Frank Solich a few years back Nebraska has lost its place as a glamor job.

Greg Robinson , Syracuse: A loss to terrible Pittsburgh. They only question should be at this point is who will be replacing Robinson. If, for whatever brain damaged reason, Syracuse keeps Robinson around another year take it as a sign they have abandoned their football program.

Dave Wannstedt, Pittsburgh: Yea, you beat Syracuse. You gave them a devastating 20-17 stomping with an awesome 10 point fourth quarter comeback. You had no turnovers, a running back with 140 yards only four penalties and you still had to make a fourth quarter run against one of the worst teams in all of D1A.

Ed Orgeron, Mississippi: Yep, you won too. Barely. Against 3 – 6 D1AA Northwestern State. Now you get to be fodder for LSU and, if it’s even possible, fodder for Mississippi State.

Mike Leech, Texas Tech: Woo hoo you won too. Once again you proved what a powerhouse you are against perpetual doormats. Somehow only beating Baylor by 31 seems a little disappointing for you. I think it’s safe to say at this point with games at Texas and home versus Oklahoma your wins for 2007 are behind you. Maybe you’ll luck into a bowl game with the Sun Belt champs and can have a good showing.

Mike Stoops, Arizona: Yet another winner on the list. Now all you have to do to get to a bowl game is win out against Oregon and Arizona State.

Karl Dorrell, UCLA: UCLA has lost 3 of 4 with their only win being against Cal. That of course coming after they lost to Notre Dame. They are in true need of adding a WTF to the front of their initials. WTFUCLA has a good ring to it don’t ya think? You need to pluck one win from games against Oregon, Arizona State and @USC to get to a bowl game. I don’t think anyone would be surprised if you lost all three or somehow managed to win one or two of those. WTFUCLA is a rudderless ship sailing at the mercy of the winds and currents.

Others of note: Chunky Weis with his runny nose. About half of the ACC should be looking for new employment including Duke, Maryland, Georgia Tech, Clemson, and Miami might as well start their next search.

Hey Charlie Fat Ass

Wipe your fucking nose you fat fuck.  Oh, and HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Hey college football media, take Georgia Tech’s d-coordinator Jon Tenuda’s cock out of your mouth.   Getting destroyed by a 110+ offense at home is pathetic.

Where’s Your Heisman Now?

Heisman Winner:

Denis Dixon, Oregon: Dude beat the Trojans. If he and the Ducks do it again this week versus the Sun Devils send Denis the trophy. It’s over.

Eh, Maybes:

Mike Hart, Michigan: Weeeeeeeeeeee the Wolverines beat the Gophers. They beat them without Mike Hart. I’m pretty sure 80% of D1A teams could beat Minnesota playing them 10 on 11.

Matt Ryan, Boston College: Probably belongs in the not happening group. But but but that awesome comeback in the last 4 minutes!!!!!! Yeah, it was awesome when Matt admitted after the game the Hokie defense had gotten tired. Plus whether he admits it or not Bud Foster went prevent and got burned. What the hell are you doing covering a running back with a defensive end at that point in the game? Let’s also not forget in the first half BC had a 4th and 15 inside the Hokie 25. Ryan got chased out of the pocket. What did he do? Try and force a pass somewhere SINCE IT WAS FOURTH DOWN? Nope. Threw the ball away out of bounds. Not the move of the best player in college football.

Adios:

Andre Woodson, Kentucky: Losing at home to Mississippi State? Losing at home to Mississippi State by 17? Your chances are gone.

Nope, not happening:

Pat White, Steve Slaton, West Virginia: If it was one of you getting the focus you might still be in the race, but since you’re sharing a dim spot light yer outta here.

Tim Tebow, Florida: If there was ever a ball hog in football Tim is it. The Gators have lost 3 of 4, Tebow is hurting and still had the most rushing attempts last week.

Ray Rice, Rutgers: Strike 1 – Rutgers, Strike 2 – Big East, Strike 3 – losing, Kevin Smith from Central Florida is a better choice than Rice, but ain’t nobody from the C-USA gonna win the Heisman.

Derrick McFadden, Arkansas: What big game did you have this year?

Michael Crabtree, Texas Tech: He’s a freshman

Never should have been considered:

Colt Brennan, Hawaii, and Graham Harrell, Texas Tech: Seriously, Texas Tech never ever ever ever never ever shows for any game where if they actually won it might give them the appearance they are a quality team. Colt and Graham run up huge numbers in megapass oriented offenses.